January 2014 Jokes

Where does a ghost go on a Saturday night?
Anyplace he can boo-gie!

What is a monster's favorite bean?
A human bean!

What do you call an old jelly bean?
A has bean!

Why do deamons and ghouls hang out?
Because deamons are a ghouls best friend!

What is a mummies favorite type of music?
Wrap!

What do ghosts say when something is really neat?
Ghool! (yes, it is really spelled "ghoul" but part of the joke is the combination of "cool" and "ghoul")

Thanks for reading!
Ev
A Heck of A Nice Guy

Why We No longer need HR

Wow bernard. Pulling no punches here. Does he have a point when you consider it for a while?
Ev

Why We No Longer Need HR
by
Bernard Marr
Best-Selling Author and Enterprise Performance Expert

The time has come for HR (Human Resources) departments to call it a day. HR departments often portray themselves as a valued business partner for management and staff alike. However, how can anyone take a department seriously that refers to people as ‘resources’?

Nothing matters more to companies than the people who work there. Companies are nothing without the right people! And I am sure that not one, single individual wants to be referred to as a ‘human resource’.

So, the first point I want to make is that the name is wrong: very wrong. It signals to everyone that this department manages ‘human resources’ in a top-down fashion, i.e. managing humans in a similar way to other resources such as finance, property or machines. If departments can’t see that this is sending out the wrong messages, then they don’t deserve to be there anyway.

Another issue is that HR departments are trying to serve two masters – which, in most cases, is not very successful. On the one hand, they are there to provide support for the employees and, on the other hand, they are there for the company and the senior management to help manage (and monitor, discipline, appraise, etc.) employees. This conflict of interest can cause friction and in many instances HR departments swing to the ‘support the company’ side, rather than the ‘support the employees’ side.

There is more. We can argue about whether the name is right or wrong, or whether the focus should be on the company or on the employees, but what really matters is whether HR delivers value. I have recently seen a number of companies that shut their HR departments down completely; outsourced the function or reduced it to a minimum. The reason they have done it, and not suffered any significant throw-back, is because HR wasn’t delivering any real value. Most of their time was taken up with bureaucratic and administrative tasks or legal issues. If HR doesn’t deliver some unique benefits then outsourcing it makes a lot of business sense.

Other companies, however, have invested in the ‘people function’. They realize that they need people who ensure that the company finds, recruits, retains and develops its people. So here is what I recommend:

1.Don’t call it HR!
2.2. Put two teams in place: a people analytics’ team and a people support team.
3.The role of the people support team is, as the title suggests, supporting all employees in the organization – from the front line to the senior leadership team. The tasks of this team include: helping employees with their development; ensuring staff engagement; identifying issues with morale and culture and generally looking after the well-being of the people in the business.
4.The role of the people analytics team is to look at people more scientifically and support the company with insights and analytics. The kind of questions this team would help to answer includes: What are our talent gaps? What makes a good employee in our company and how do we best recruit them? Which employees have got the highest potential? How can we predict staff turnover? Etc.
5.Outsource or automate the non-value adding part of HR.
As always, I am interested to hear your reactions. What do you think? Do you agree or disagree? Please let me know and share your views.

How to Land an Interview Using Social Media

Robin thanks for the great article and tips!
Ev

How to Land an Interview Using Social Media
By Robin Madell

The job search isn't what it used to be. So if you're using old methods to try to score your dream position, you may be left standing at the corporate gates.

Love it or hate it, social media has become a mainstay in the employment game. Recruiters check it for leads, human resources directors screen candidates based on it and hiring managers use it to do their due diligence before choosing whom to interview. In some ways, your online profile has become as important as your résumé.

To ensure your best shot at landing an interview in the digital age, consider this advice based on a poll of both career and social media experts.

Craft an Identity

"Social media can be used to create an identity and allow the user to show off a particular expertise. For example, using a certain hashtag or becoming recognized as an expert on Klout, Quora or Linkedin Groups can increase the appeal of a job candidate. Most employers do online searches on candidates before extending an interview or job offer. If the results come back showing their deep knowledge or interest in areas related to the organization, the likelihood of getting a call will be much greater."

– Simon Tam, Digital Marketing Strategist

Engage With Companies

"The key for job seekers is to do their research and seek out prospective employers who are leveraging social media to spread their employment brand. With a little bit of research and curiosity, job seekers can put themselves in front of these innovative organizations who are creating and cultivating dedicated 'careers' presences on social media specifically for this reason."

– Yair Riemer, Vice President of Global Marketing, CareerArc Group

Look for Side Doors

"Look for social media side doors to access. Does the CEO have a blog? Does the VP of Marketing tweet? Get on his or her radar by leaving interesting comments and providing the ego boost of a retweet or +1 now and then."

–Ian Greenleigh, author of "The Social Media Side Door: How to Bypass the Gatekeepers to Gain Greater Access and Influence"

Create the Right Footprint

"Social media can be your gold mine or flat line. We live in a world where we are 1 to 2 degrees away from the ultimate contact. Instead of posting about what happened on TV or a party, create a social media footprint that makes you look good. Highlight your work online and share it with potential employers. Offer to solve a problem or to help them figure something out. People notice when you are putting yourself out there and getting things done."

–Vannessa Wade, Social Media Consultant

Start Linking

"Develop a LinkedIn network before you need it, if possible. Then you won't be alone. Your network can help you get your foot in the door. Use LinkedIn's Advanced Search function to identify people in your network who work for or have connections at your target companies. And don't be afraid to ask for their help. Sell yourself in your LinkedIn profile. Employers will look at it. Don't be afraid to toot your own horn. Tout what you've accomplished during your career but – more importantly – explain what you're capable of bringing to a new employer."

–Wayne Breitbarth, author of "The Power Formula for LinkedIn Success: Kick-start Your Business, Brand, and Job Search"

Tweet Your Way In

"Create a professional user name and bio that includes your professional interests – and one or two personal details. Include tweets in your Twitter stream that demonstrate your interest in your field of job type of interest. Don't worry about always having something to say – retweeting and giving credit to the ideas of others shows that you are a team player. Use Twitter search engines to find people who work at – or recruit for – organizations of interest. Demonstrate your interest in their content before you say I want to work for you."

–Chandlee Bryan, Career Coach and co-author of "The Twitter Job Search Guide"

Don't Blow It

"Attracting an employer's attention with social media is a smart move because employers want to hire people that already love their company. The caveat to this is that social media can be a slippery slope when the lines between one's professional and personal brand become blurry. It's very easy to kill a relationship with an off-handed comment or a joke gone wrong. Don't slip up by becoming lazy or too casual with your social media content. After all, your future boss may be reading what you type."

–Lauren Milligan, Résumé Expert and Career Coach, ResuMAYDAY

Robin Madell has spent two decades as a writer, journalist and communications consultant on business, leadership, career and diversity issues. She has interviewed more than 200 thought leaders around the globe and has won 20 awards for editorial excellence.

Explaining Employment Gaps on Your Resume? Don’t do this.

A common problem these days.
Thanks Maren for the advice.
Ev

Explaining Employment Gaps on Your Resume? Don’t do this.
By

Maren Hogan

So you have a gap on your resume. What are some ways you can explain this gap away during an interview or follow-up?

Don’t be apologetic. You set the tone for how this employment gap will be perceived. If you present it as a negative, it will be seen as negative. Instead, inform them about how you used that time to grow in other fields or highlight the fact that you stayed up-to-date and relevant in the space. If you volunteered or consulted, speak up! (Better yet, put those opportunities on the resume if they are long enough periods of time.)

Do ask your former employer or colleagues for reference letters. Be specific about what you would like them to include. A short handwritten paragraph about what a great person you are isn’t going to cut the mustard with a professional recruiter. Maybe they can think of a specific instance in which your skills and experience helped the team. Ask them to concentrate on your strengths as they apply to the workplace.

Don’t lie about it. Before you know it, you can speak Mandarin and you’re a risk management expert. It’s a slippery slope my friends, and it’s not worth going down. In today’s job world, layoffs are pretty common place. Unemployment gaps have lost the stigma that they once had. There are so many people in the workforce that have dealt with a layoff personally or in their circle, that there is less judgement surrounding layoff employment gaps. So there’s no reason to hide it.

Do tell them what you did while you weren’t employed. Did you further your education? Did you maintain your presence in the field? Volunteer work, consulting and freelancing are all relevant things to mention in this gap. List these things just like you would another position on your resume. Even if you were working on a personal project that would be relevant to your work, you should mention it.

Don’t bad mouth your former employer. Everyone knows that suffering a layoff is a very bitter pill to swallow. By speaking badly about your former employer, or even alluding to a negative departure, you pretty much just took a big red “Negative” stamp and plopped it down on your resume. This hiring manager definitely gets what it is to get RIF’d, if you can surprise them by staying positive about your experience and time with the company, you’re far better off.

Do read and learn from job listings. Having the generic strengths and experiences that the hiring manager is going to see fifty times a day, in no way sets you apart. Instead, get on the job boards and consider what skills and experiences hiring managers in your field are specifically looking for. Now use those credentials in your own resume for a far more tailored presentation.

Don’t skim over the gap. Many posts out there will tell you to just use years for employment dates to cover up the gap, rather than using months. Again, this is nothing to be ashamed of. It can be helpful to shortly cover the reason for your employment gap in your cover letter. No one has time to read about your failing marriage or dog dying. Keep it short and simple.

Do let them know how you stayed up-to-date in your industry. The biggest concern that any hiring manager has when they see an employment gap is that you no longer have any idea what you’re doing. Especially as technology relates to any field, if you’re gone for any amount of time, there’s a good chance that you missed some sort of relevant technological change in your industry. Whether it’s the cool new app that everyone is using, or current common practice, study up and present your knowledge with confidence.

Snow Day! Cold Day!

My usual blog is not here today. The office is closed because of a huge cold spell rolling through the Midwest. It is -13 degrees right now!
I don't need an office to write my blog, but I can't pass up a...


Snow Day! Snow Day! Snow Day!
or more appropriately...
Cold Day! Cold Day! Cold Day!

What does this have to do with HR, Recruiting, or Sales?

NOTHING!

EXCEPT...

Once in awhile you have to stop and do the things that keep you young inside. Recharge your batteries and refresh your soul. It is often the little things that make life worth living.
You have to enjoy them when you can because tomorrow is not promised to anyone.

As Ferris Bueller said:
"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't slow down, you could miss it."
Find your snow day and enjoy it!

So what did I do with my snow day?
Raced slot cars with my young son.
What did you do with yours?

Thanks!
Ev
A Heck of a Nice Guy

You Can Consider Looks When Hiring A CEO?

So we are not supposed to consider how a person looks when it comes to the hiring process, unless we're hiring a CEO according to this article and study?
I thought we as recruiters were not supposed to consider looks at all. Isn't that what the EEO statements we have to attach to everything are supposed to say? I guess that only applies to SOME jobs. Anyone have a can of worms I can open?
Thanks Kiran for reporting this.
Ev

Want better returns? Hire a good-looking CEO
By: Kiran Moodley | Assistant Producer, CNBC.com

Attractive CEOs receive higher total compensation, better returns on their first days on the job and boost stock performance when they appear on television, according to research by two economists at the University of Wisconsin.Attractive chief executives (CEOs) receive higher total compensation, better returns on their first days on the job and boost stock performance when they appear on television, according to the preliminary findings of a new study.

Joseph Halford and Hung-Chia Hsu, two economists at the University of Wisconsin, released a working paper called "Beauty is wealth: CEO appearance and shareholder value". In the paper, they rated the attractiveness of 677 CEOs from S&P 500 companies based on "facial geometry".

The study wanted to find out whether there was a positive relation between the attractiveness of a company's CEO and a return on investment in that company, something argued by John Graham, R.Campbell and Manju Puri in a 2010 paper from Duke University. These three authors said that good looks made CEOs appear more competent and gave them better negotiating skills, enabling them to extract better deals for shareholders.

When looking at the relationship between CEO attractiveness and stock returns around their first day in the job, Halford and Hsu concluded: "We find that FAI (facial attractiveness index) has a positive and significant impact on stock returns surrounding the first day when the CEO is on the job, indicating that shareholders seem to perceive more attractive CEOs to be more valuable."

Halford and Hsu told CNBC that Marissa Mayer, the president and CEO of Yahoo, was a good example, based on their report. "She scored 8.45 (out of 10) in our facial attractiveness index and is among the top 5 percent (best-looking) in our sample," they wrote. "Yahoo has been doing well since she became the CEO (about 158 percent increase in stock price).

"Of course, we don't mean that all the increase in stock price is from her appearance. We just find that there might be some positive correlation between the two."

The economists conducted a variety of tests, for example, analysing 1,830 M&A (merger and acquisition) deals between 1985 and 2012. They discovered that: "The evidence...suggests that more attractive CEOs receive more surpluses for their firms from M&A transactions, a finding consistent with the hypothesis that more attractive CEOs improve shareholder value through superior negotiating prowess."

Furthermore, the paper looked into CEO television appearances -- which they restricted to those shown on CNBC.com between 2008 and 2012 -- and whether there was any correlation between the appearance of an attractive CEO and stock returns. Halford and Hsu concluded that shareholders responded positively to viewing more attractive CEOs on television.

David Paul Morris | Bloomberg via Getty Images Marissa Mayer, chief executive officer of Yahoo! Inc.Does this mean that Halford and Hsu would suggest that companies hire stunning CEOs to ensure a more profitable existence?

"Our results do not suggest that, when searching for CEOs, firms should only look at appearance without considering other abilities," they wrote via email to CNBC. "On the other hand, for firms that rely more on the negotiation and visibility aspects, maybe they should place more weight on appearance when searching for CEOs."

This is not the first time the interaction between beauty and business has been investigated.

In 1994, University of Texas economist Daniel Hamermesh coined the phrase "pulchrinomics": the economic study of beauty. He wrote about the topic in theAmerican Economic Review, commenting on a study conducted by himself and his colleague, Jeff Biddle, where interviewers in the 1970s had had ranked the attractiveness of U.S. and Canadian workers, as well as noted their earnings. More attractive workers were found to earn a 5 percent premium over those of average appearance.

"Wages of people with below-average looks are lower than those of average-looking workers; and there is a premium in wages for good-looking people that is slightly smaller than this penalty," the report noted.

Commenting on Halford and Hsu's report, Robert Williams, principal and director at recruitment firm Asia Media Search, said first impressions were important.

"A commanding presence will add credibility either consciously or subconsciously, rightly or wrongly," he told CNBC via email. "My guess would be that Wall Street, like Washington, will always put stock in good looks as a measure of ability.

"I wonder if in today's instant media world, whether Abraham Lincoln, with his acne scarred face, lanky body and high pitched voice, would ever have been elected, or FDR (Franklin D. Roosevelt) for that matter. Would the television media focus just on his wheelchair?"

He concluded: "As a recruiter, I feel the focus should be a candidate's abilities and accomplishments, not the smile. But human nature is what it is."

2013 Year In Review

One column I like to put together is a year-in-review.

YouTube does a good job putting together a video of the top searches. I've included a couple of other fun videos as well.

Do you know what the fox says? If you don't, it was the big dance hit of the year.

The video below isn't the official video released, but it was the only one allowed by YouTube to be published on this site.

The funniest video I saw in 2013 is below. Take three minutes for a good laugh.

Happy 2014!

Thanks for everything you've done for me!

Ev

A Heck of A Nice Guy