Bad LinkedIn Responses

I've written before on what make an effective LinkedIn Invitation:
what-makes-good-linkedin-invitation

Lately I've been swamped by LinkedIn invitations by people I do not know and have no connection with.The conversations usually start like this:

From unknown LI Member to me:
"Everet I want to add you to my LinkedIn network."

Since someone took the time to actually put my name in the invite I will look to see their profile and who they are.
If I can't make a logical connection as to why they are contacting me I will send out the following:

"Hi ________________,
I've been racking my brain trying to remember how we know each other. I don't want to sound rude or dumb, however can you please remind me how we know each other or tell me how I can help you?
Thank you,
Everet"

Here are some of the recent responses:

Everet,
Great memory, we've never met (that I know). As a job seeker, I am reaching out to recruiters as part of my job search.
As someone who had a brother who raced slot cars (many years ago), I thought it especially cool to connect with you.
Thanks,
D---- K----

Points for honesty. You're expanding your job search. You think I might be able to help. Problem for you is; I'm not a recruiter. If you read my profile you would know that. That immediately dismissed you.
You did pick up on my interest in slotcars and that is good and got my attention, however you told me it was your brother that raced them. No details on the kind of cars or tracks. Since it isn't you that share my hobby why would I connect with you? Your brother and I have have more in common it would seem.

I believe we are connected thru others on LinkedIn either thru different occupations or different levels of frfiends.
J-----

I looked. We have no common connections. I also don't have any "frfiends" in common with you. I forgive most spelling errors if you are someone I know, however if you are trying to establish a professional connection double check these short messages. Create a positive impression of yourself.

Everet,
We actually have never met, I am looking to expand my network in order to hopefully get my face and qualifications out into the market in order to hopefully find that stable position that I have been searching for the last couple of years. I am tired of taking jobs in order to be laid-off when there is a production shift or an ownership change.
Thank you and I hope you understand my desire to add you to the network,
W------ A----

Someone who is bitter and tired. Why would I want to add someone to my network that says those things when i haven't met them? I don't like being around negative people. Most people don't so why lead with your troubles.

LinkedIn is based on people being and acting in a professional manner. Just because you are not standing next to a person doesn't mean you can let your professional etiquette lapse.

For the follow up articles to this:
ask-questions
meet-them


Thanks!
Ev
A Heck of A Nice Guy