August Jokes

Jokes for August 2010 (Always clean enough to tell your mother):

Where does a boat go when it gets sick?
(The doc)

A woman walks into a vet's waiting room.
She's dragging a wet rabbit on a leash.
The rabbit does not want to be there.
"Sit, Fluffy," she says.
Fluffy glares at her, and sopping wet, jumps up on another customer's lap, getting water all over him.
"I said sit, now there's a good Fluffy," says the woman, slightly embarrassed.
Fluffy quite miserable and perhaps feeling rebellious, squats in the middle of the room and urinates.
The woman, mortally embarrassed, shouts,
"Darn it Fluffy, will you be good?!"Fluffy then starts a fight with a Doberman and pursues it out of the office.
As the woman leaves to go after it, she turns to the rest of the flabbergasted customers and says,
"Pardon me. I've just washed my hare, and can't do a thing with it!"

THE POTATO
Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other, and finally they got married, and had a little sweet potato, which they called 'Yam.'
Of course, they wanted the best for Yam.
When it was time, they told her about the facts of life.
They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't get accidentally mashed, and get a bad name for herself like 'Hot Potato,' and end up with a bunch of Tater Tots.
Yam said not to worry; no Spud would get her into the sack and make a rotten potato out of her!
But on the other hand she wouldn't stay home and become a Couch Potato either.
She would get plenty of exercise so as not to be skinny like her Shoestring cousins.
When she went off to Europe, Mr. and Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch out for the hard-boiled guys from Ireland and the greasy guys from France called the French Fries.
When she went out west, they told Yam to watch out for the Indians so she wouldn't get scalloped.
Yam said she would stay on the straight and narrow and wouldn't associate with those high class Yukon Golds.
Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U. (Potato University) so that when she graduated she'd really be in the Chips.
But in spite of all they did for her, one-day Yam came home and announced she was going to marry Tom Brokaw.
Tom Brokaw? Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset.
They told Yam she couldn't possibly marry Tom Brokaw because he's just.....a “COMMON TATER”.

Feel free to submit jokes to share for September!

Everet Kamikawa
"A Heck of A Nice Guy"