November 2014 Jokes

November was an election month and it featured Bears vs. Packers in football.
Given those two elements I thought these were appropriate.
Thanks to M.T. for sending these in!
Ev
A Heck of A Nice Guy

Meanwhile, I know these are bad.  Just grin and Bear it. 

Jay Cutler told his receivers a joke, but it was over their heads

Cutler was not able to get into his driveway – there was an end zone painted on it. 

Cutler can’t use a phone because he can’t find the receiver.

Jay Cutler is like a Grizzly Bear.  He goes into hibernation every fall. 

The Bears don’t have a website because they can’t put three “W’s” together. 

What does Cutler do after he wins the superbowl?  Turns off the playstation. 

Oh, and I am sure you heard about Gov. Walker’s tweet, but in case not, he tweeted that he now has more wins in Wisconsin than Jay Cutler. 

Happy Thanksgiving Cartoons

We have a lot of to be thankful for living in this country.
I'm thankful for my family, clients, and you for taking the time to read this blog!
Give thanks for all you have and for all the struggles that make you better.
Give Thanks for all the good people you've hired and all the good clients you've gained.
Hug someone you love.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Ev
A Heck of A Nice Guy

My Dad's book. I have to get a plug in on the biggest eating day of the year!

Have A Great Out of Office Message (UNLESS YOUR COMPANY HAS NO SENSE of PROFESSIONAL HUMOR)

Hi!

You have almost reached Everet.

Thanks for your email. While I know it is inconvenient – I do need to let you know I am not available to answer your emails until July 22nd.

Why?

I've heard tales of places with five foot high mice, giant dogs, and ducks that speak. After years of hearing these tales I'm off to see if they are true (I'm going to Disneyland).

I'm a client and I need to talk to you!
As you know my clients are my priority and I appreciate you to the ends of the world! If you are one of my clients and need immediate help, please contact A---- H---, Director of Career Services, 444-555-1212 or myboss@whereIwork.edu

I'm a student and I need help!
Please see above or wait until I get back. Remember A---- will be busier than normal without me, so don't run into the office screaming and yelling for her because she may be talking to someone else at the same time. Bringing cookies would be a nice touch and a good way to start your conversation.

What is the realistic expectation for a response while you are gone?
None. I understand these giant mice, ducks, and dogs are shy.
I don't want to spook them with beeps and dings from my phone going off while searching for them.

Isn't it going to be weird being unplugged in this digital world?
Yes. Good thing I have several years of practice.

I really do appreciate the time you took to email me. I will respond as quickly as possible. Remember that Outlook only sends an out of office response once – so if you will need this contact information please save it to a document.

Thank you!
Everet

The above was my out of office email for a vacation period at a former employer
(have-great-out-of-office-email-message proof-clever-outbound-messages-do-work).
There was never an issue with the same message for other vacations.
In fact co-workers and clients LOVED it.
It made them WANT TO CALL ME BACK and they told me so.

When I came back from vacation I changed my message back to my usual:

Hi!

You have almost reached Everet.

Thanks for your email. While I know it is inconvenient – I do need to let you know I am not available to answer your emails until (date).

I'm a client and I need to talk to you!

As you know my clients are my priority and I appreciate you to the ends of the world! If you are one of my clients and need immediate help, please contact A---- H---, Director of Career Services, 444-555-1212 or myboss@whereIwork.edu

I'm a student and I need help!
Please see above or wait until I get back. Remember A---- will be busier than normal without me, so don't run into the office screaming and yelling for her because she may be talking to someone else at the same time. Bringing cookies would be a nice touch and a good way to start your conversation. I really do appreciate the time you took to email me. I will respond as quickly as possible. Remember that Outlook only sends an out of office response once – so if you will need this contact information please save it to a document.

Thank you!
Everet
 
Clients appreciated my personalization and humor!
All was right with the world until...a new director was hired.
After a few months on the job, suddenly the director tells me that "someone at corporate has a problem with my email message." I asked who it was and if I can hear it straight from them. The director never came clean with the answer.
My opinion is that no one at corporate had an issue with my message, the new director did.
Rather than ask WHY my message was the way it was and what response it provided, the director just wanted it changed to the same boring message everyone has.
Managers be straight with your people. If you like or hate something say so, don't invent imaginary people and reasons and hide behind them. Your employees may or may not like you for it, but they'll respect you because they will know where they stand.

Eventually I changed my message to the one below:

Stop! Please read this message.
Thanks for your email.

As of ---------,----- Everet is no longer working at --- -------.

I'm a client and I need to talk to you!
As you know my clients are my priority and I appreciate you to the ends of the world! If you are one of my clients and need immediate help, please contact G---- H-----, Director of Career Services, 414-555-1212 or person@forprofitcollege.edu

I'm a student and I need help!
Please see above. Remember G---- will be busier than normal without me, so don't run into the office screaming and yelling for her because she may be talking to someone else at the same time. Bringing cookies would be a nice touch and a good way to start your conversation.

I really do appreciate the time you took to work with me over the years. Remember that Outlook only sends an out of office response once – so if you will need this contact information please save it to a document.

The new director's opinion on my message wasn't  what made me leave, but it was a sign that the culture had changed. Clients love to work with real people. People who are honest to them and themselves.

I have an extrovert personality and wear my heart on my sleeve.

By reading this blog you know I like to have fun and present things in an interesting way with a sense of humor.

Managers and salespeople be yourself.
If you are being told you shouldn't be and it is the core of who you are as a person, maybe look for another home.
Managers when you have someone who is performing and a great fit for the company, maybe pick your battles and put aside what you might not like and let that person keep doing what they are doing (as long of course as it is legal, ethical, and doesn't harm the company). It saves a lot of time and money rather than having to advertise, search, and hire someone else and get them up to speed.

Thanks for reading and listening to my out of office message all these years!
Ev
A Heck of A Nice Guy

What Makes A Good Boss?

I've had good bosses and bad bosses.
I've been a good boss and a bad boss (only in my opinion of course...ha...ha :)
In reading Tony's article
What is a good boss
it reminds me of what I'm doing right and what needs to be worked on.
What did you learn from the bosses you've had.
Thanks Tony!
Ev
BTW: What happened to point number four?

How to be a great boss? Part II. Mentorship Mondays -Lessons on Leadership
by
Tony Jalan

"The challenge of leadership is to be strong, but not rude; be kind, but not weak; be bold, but not bully; be thoughtful, but not lazy; be humble, but not timid; be proud, but not arrogant; have humor but without folly.” – Jim Rohn

Stop for a moment and think of all the great bosses you have had. What traits made them great? I have asked this question countless of times over the past 15 years. I have heard on what makes a great boss vs a horrible boss.
What traits make bosses great, appreciated and respected? Below are 7 simple characteristics that make a great boss gathered from 100s of interviews.


1. Great bosses have a high SAYDO ratio! What they say they are going to do they do! It was a few years back and someone said, " Here we go again..The idea of the month...My boss reads a book then thinks it's the best thing since slice bread. Why don't we actually DO what we SAY we are going to do before changing things up. It actually may make a difference!"
What is your SAYDO ratio?

2. Great Bosses Praise in Public, Criticize in Private. - Hundreds of interviews and recognition has to be in the top 3 for traits of Great Bosses.

3. Great bosses-Seek first to understand vs seeking first to be understood- One interviewee once said, "My favorite boss was a great listener. I would come to her with an issue and before offering advice she would always ask me for more details about the issue and really try to understand everything before jumping in and giving her two cents. This empowered me! Most of the time I knew the answer. All I had to do was talk it out loud."
Are you reacting to issues or responding to issues?

5. Great bosses don't try to please everyone and make it their mission to be liked.- If you try to please everyone someone is going to be disappointed. Building trust in any organization is vital to its success. You do that everyday. Letting everyone know what is acceptable and what isn't. What values drive your decisions. If your staff believes that your process in making decisions is fair and in black and white they can work through their disappointments and frustrations. What are your Standards of Performance and does your team know what they are?

6.Great bosses want to learn from others and maintain humility-Assuming your employees aren’t smarter than you in countless ways is a big mistake. Asking for their advice, thinking it will make you look weak is not true. It could, in fact, keep you from a blunder. Holding yourself to a different standard of accountability than your staff is a recipe for disaster. Apologizing for a mistake doesn't undercut your standing as a leader. It simply shows that you are HUMAN!
Develop a reputation for responding without a roller coaster of emotions to your employees' mistakes. The way you handle theirs sets a tone for how yours are viewed by them.

7.Great bosses apologize- "I will never forget when my boss apologized for messing up.I nearly fell off my chair!" Always apologize sincerely and specifically when you screw up, publicly and privately. Use the lessons of your own mistakes to help yourself and others grow. Leaders can be more effective when they teach from their failures rather than just their victories.

Your people are your greatest resource; listen to their feedback and encourage their dreams. You never know where your next great idea will come from, your next great leader, so empower everyone up and down throughout your organization to contribute and make a difference.
Hopefully, you have received value from this two part series on " How to be a great boss?". I would love to hear your feedback on other traits that make a boss GREAT!

Thank you for investing your time in reading this post!
Tony Jalan
Developing Leaders one person at a time.

7 Money Myths About Millennials

In my experience a lot of companies seem to think they can make a low money offer to millennials and they'll take anything because of the myths below. Remember when making an offer money still matters to people no matter what you read.
Thanks Valencia for helping to set the record straight.
Ev

By Valencia Higuera, Contributor
7-money-myths-about-millennials 
Just about everyone has an opinion about the millennial generation, which includes about 80 million people born between approximately 1982 and 2002. And, unfortunately, opinions aren't all positive. If anything, millennials receive the baddest rap of all generations. Sure, they're a diverse, social and tech-savvy generation. But at the same time, there's no shortage of stereotypes attached to these young adults. They're often described as pampered, lazy and entitled. And, with regard to personal finances, many believe millennials don't have a firm grip on their money, largely due to present economic conditions.
It's true that some millennials find it harder to save and balance their money in the aftermath of the recession, and many have been impacted by the lack of available jobs. But this doesn't mean the generation is financially doomed. In fact, research shows that many commonly held beliefs about millennials and their money just aren't true.

1. They're selfish with their money.
Judging by the number of selfies this generation posts on social media sites, millennials are the "me" generation -- and often labeled as narcissists. However, this generation isn't overly self-absorbed and only concerned with themselves. According to data compiled by the Nielsen Company, "three-quarters of millennials made a financial gift to a non-profit in 2011." Additionally, "63 percent of millennials feel it is their responsibility to care for an elderly parent, compared with only 55 percent of boomers."

2. They don't care about their personal finances.
There's plenty of data that suggests otherwise. A 2013 Wells Fargo survey found that more than half of millennials (about 54 percent) say debt is their "biggest financial concern." And according to a recent Fidelity study, 39 percent of millennials worry about their financial future "at least once a week." Contrary to what some people believe, this generation isn't sitting around with their heads stuck in the sand. They're regrouping and making adjustments in the wake of the Great Recession -- just like every other generation.

3. They're all happily insured.
Health care reform gave millennials who otherwise couldn't get health insurance access to coverage, and given that the Affordable Care Acts requires everyone to purchase insurance, some might conclude that millennials now have the insurance they need -- but this isn't the case. A survey by Princeton Survey Research Associates International revealed 24 percent of Americans age 18 to 29 don't have health insurance.
There are several possible reasons behind the lack of coverage, such as the inability to afford it due to high student loan debt and modest salaries. Millennials are also less likely to carry other types of coverage, such as life, renter's and disability insurance.

4. They spend money irresponsibly.
Believe it or not, this is a deal-conscious generation. Although millennials are more likely to make an impulse purchase, they're careful about how they spend their money. The Nielsen Company survey reports that "deals account for 31 percent of their shopping dollars." Additionally, "the top 20 apps used by millennials are either retail or discount focused, with Amazon Mobile and Groupon topping the charts."

5. They're all broke.
Living paycheck to paycheck isn't a foreign concept for many millennials, but don't feel sorry for this generation as a whole. Although the Nielsen survey says "younger Millennials have a median household income of $24,973 -- roughly half the overall median income of $49,297," millennials are the most educated generation, and therefore more likely to enjoy higher earnings as the economy and job market improves. The survey also found that "millennials make up 14.7 percent of those with assets beyond $2 million, just behind boomers," and "roughly 8 percent have their own businesses."

6. They want the American Dream.
Everyone wants a four-bedroom house in suburban American with a white picket fence, right? Home buying might have been item No. 1 on the to-do list of boomers and Gen X, but many millennials are taking their time.
Approximately two-thirds of millennials rent; they're also more likely to live with relatives or a roommate. What's more, in 2011,"14 percent of millennial homeowners went back to renting compared with 4 percent of the general homeowner population," per the Nielsen survey. Whether millennials choose to rent or buy, urban living seems to be more attractive than suburban life. About 62 percent of millennials prefer living in urban settings where everything is within close proximity -- home, office, entertainment, shopping and restaurants.

7. They have unrealistic expectations.
At present, millennials might not earn as much as they would like, they might struggle with student debt, have no health insurance and keep limited funds in their retirement accounts -- but overall, they're optimistic about their financial future. It might take longer to achieve what their parents have, but they're not giving up.
About 67 percent of millennials think they'll ultimately achieve a better standard of living than their parents, according to the Wells Fargo survey. In addition to this outlook, "half of millennials say they're confident in their own abilities to earn and save money for their financial future."

A Linked In Profile is NOT a Resume

Recently a member of my team received an email from a  client.
The recruiter had written a nice summary of the candidate's qualifications and included a link to his LinkedIn profile. 
In this case the candidate wasn't exactly sure about if he was interested in the job and had several questions that the recruiter couldn't answer in full because they were of a technical nature of the job.
The recruiter decided to send over the summary and LI profile to see if the client wouldn't mind talking to the candidate (the client has been really good at this for this position as it is rather complicated).

The response from the client to the recruiter was:

I am looking through his LinkedIn profile and it reads very heavy with pre-sales and data center technologies.

While these are certainly strong aspects of the role, the role is also a Senior Network Engineer flavor.

In other words, actual configuration, deployment and support of routers, switches, firewalls, security solutions, etc. I need someone that is as strong at building enterprise network environments as much as talking to and “selling” them.

I will wait for his resume to look for specific network engineering experience before calling him.

This is a perfectly legitimate response, and yes could have been mitigated by the recruiter waiting for the resume, however it reminded me of something else; as a recruiter, job seeker, or a client you have to remember that Linked In profiles are not a substitute for a resume.

Many LI users tailor their profiles to the specific career or industry that they are in or want and list only relevant experience. Heck, if I put all my jobs and duties I ever had in my life on my profile you could read War & Peace faster. Part of the purpose of the profile is to establish yourself as an expert in a particular field.

If you are really interested in a candidate remember to use their LI profile as a guide to asking more questions about their experience relating to your position and not the complete history of their experience.

Thanks for reading!

Ev

A Heck of A Nice Guy

Stay Professional

I'm sure that recruiters reading this have had many candidates that think they can be informal with you in conversations after you've met with them. 

If you're a job seeker reading this, the answer is...you can't!
I recently received an email  from a candidate I placed when she was a new college grad and looking for her first IT job. It has been almost two years since she landed that first job. She reached out to me for help again. Below is her email and my response.

From: Candidate
Sent: Friday, October 31, 2014 4:14 PM
To: Ev
Subject: Resume

I take it you didn't get my resume. I will send another one to you. I have experience in deploying window 7 and desktop support. Windows 7 I did for a year and the desktop support I did for about a week and two days it want a very long contact. I would just like to get more experience and maybe a permit position if I can.
Candidate

From: Ev
Sent: Friday, October 31, 2014 4:38 PM
To: 'Candidate'
Subject: RE: Resume

Candidate:

Please re-read your email below.

Notice the spelling and grammar mistakes.

I’m not at (name of school) and cannot take time to correct these mistakes before presenting you to other recruiters or clients.

Remember you are no longer a rookie in the field or a new graduate.

Just because you know me doesn’t mean you can relax your standards.

You have experience and employers will expect more from you in terms of knowledge, attitude, and professionalism.

I want you to make sure you are always putting your best foot forward.

I’m a fan of yours so I look forward to you taking the next step in your career!

Thanks!

Ev

From: Candidate
Sent: Friday, October 31, 2014 4:33 PM
To: Ev
Subject: RE: Resume

Yes sir. Thank you
Candidate


If candidates are communicating with you in that manner, how are they communicating to your client?
Job seekers you have to remain professional in your communications with employers and recruiters at all times! If you are not, what kind of message does that say about you?
Think about if that recruiter or employer will want to hire you?

EV